sharing the stairs

because life has ups and downs…

Newlywed Tips

My stepson married his beautiful bride over the weekend. Her sister asked all of the women in her life to contribute a letter for a book that was designed to provide love, comfort, and words of wisdom. This assignment was definitely in my lane! I couldn’t wait to put my thoughts on paper. I chose to print it on a soft-pink marbled color of thick, textured stock with a fancy font.

I thought I’d share a bit of my letter with you- just in case my words might be helpful in your life, too. Whether you’re a newlywed or just someone who needs a fresh take on your relationship, this might have meaning for you.

  • Be honest- always. There will be things that are difficult to discuss. Go there. Don’t be anxious. Communication is everything.
  • Say PLEASE and THANK YOU- and expect the same in return. You are both valuable and should be appreciated.
  • Don’t be afraid to ask for space when you need it. That’s not a sign of a problem or of weakness. It’s important to catch your breath and regroup sometimes.
  • Don’t be hurt when he needs space. Guys need a reset sometimes, too.
  • Continue to grow as individuals. Support each other as you try new things.
  • Continue to grow as a couple. Go to those Chiefs and Blues games. Take your pup for walks. Cook together. Attend concerts. Work out. Travel. Have FUN together!
  • Look for the learning in every situation. In moments of happiness and in times of stress, there will always be something to learn. Find it. Use it to grow.
  • Hold hands.
  • Expect the seasons of life to change. Some will be beautiful and plentiful. Others will be scary and difficult. None of it lasts, but your love will endure.
  • Know that you make each other better. He was meant for you, and you were meant for him!
  • Fold the laundry together as you talk about nothing and everything.
  • Let him know if you need something from him. He may not know. Make sure he understands to tell you the same things. Like I said- communication!
  • The old saying really is true- never to go bed angry. It’s okay to disagree.
  • Say I LOVE YOU often! Sprinkle that phrase throughout every day. Even better- show it. Leave love notes around the house. Send a sweet text.
  • Ask about his day. Then, tell him about your day. Try to recognize the celebrations and concerns that each of you feels.
  • Listen. Even when you’re tired. Even when you don’t get it. Ask him to listen to you. Sometimes- that’s all you will need. Not someone to fix it- just someone who loves you to listen.
  • Accept that every day isn’t perfect, but that you are perfectly matched to handle anything life throws your way.
  • Know that we all love you guys- always!

As I wrote these things, I thought about my own marriage with all of the hills and valleys over the years. I’ve learned a thing or two, and I know we’ll continue to grow. That’s the beautiful thing about life.

There’s one thing I clearly understand, though. Our marriage is successful because we consider ourselves a team in everything we do- from household chores to financial decisions. The big-ticket items and the small stuff. We are truly there for each other- to love, honor, and cherish all the days of our lives.


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This entry was posted on October 16, 2019 by .
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